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Calbuzz Consultanate Offers Career Advice for Mitt

Dec14

By now, we know that Mitch Romney (ht David Letterman) proved that with a willingness to fabricate charges against an opponent, zero commitment to principle, a hefty dose of voter suppression, a wooden personality and stands that repel Latinos, blacks and Asians, a Republican candidate can win a landslide election. Among white voters.

That’s what Romney did, running out of persuadable white voters and still losing in spectacular fashion, according to a study by Republican pollster Whit Ayres for Resurgent Republic and the Hispanic Leadership Network.

Loyal Calbuzzers know that this is exactly what we have warned Republicans about for years, to no avail. And it’s not a “failure to communicate” – it’s a problem in the GOP’s fundamental stand on a pathway to citizenship.

None of which is the point of this story. We’re here today to report that members of our Calbuzz Advisory Board of Leading Authorities on Practically Everything have to say by way of advice to Mitch, in the wake of his disastrous run for the White House.

Here’s the one thing both Democrat and Republican strategists and players agree on: Romney has no future in politics. Some have nice things to say about him; others don’t want him coming anywhere near the Republican Party, and some just want to ridicule him.

Since he’s going to be at least a part-time resident of our fair state, with his seaside digs in La Jolla, Calbuzz thought it fitting to ask our California Consultanate to give Mitch some free career advice. Here’s what they said.

Republicans

– Barring a move to Utah, Romney’s pursuit of electoral office is (thankfully) over. The one way he could make a major difference for Republicans in California and nationally is to become Finance Chairman of the California Republican Party. But a recent Washington Post article reveals Mitt has no interest in rebuilding or rebranding the Republican Party. Just like his close pal Meg Whitman, Mitt’s political focus is only about Mitt and he doesn’t care about the larger importance and relevance of the GOP other than as a vehicle for his personal ambitions.

– Romney should keep his fund-raising team together and throw it behind a candidate who does not have the following attributes:
1. A business background with any hint of closing down companies or outsourcing jobs to China.
2. A person who has said harsh things about immigrants or has attacked a path to citizenship with fines, waiting period, etc as “amnesty.”
3. Who has kept binders of women.
Who is pro-life in any way that suggests legislating in that area instead of just moral suasion and paying complete respect for other views.
5. Who has had an upbringing without experiencing at least near poverty and without appreciating the wonderful diversity that is America.
6. Who is Michelle Bachman, Newt Gingrich, Rick Perry, Rick Santorum or anyone else who ran in 2012.

– Seeing how Meg Whitman always cited Mitt Romney as her mentor in business and private equity was the Bain of their existence, I would recommend that Mitt join Meg at Hewlett Packard. He should replace Ray Lane as Chairman of the Board and from that position he can mentor Meg again — as she desperately needs help. Since Meg took over as CEO of HP — stock price has tanked, revenues and profits are in the tank and they just wrote down an acquisition by over $8 billion. Mitt’s political career is over. On the national stage he was basically Meg Whitman in a blue blazer with his sense of entitlement, requisite arrogance and tin ear. Mitt and Meg at HP — perfect together.

– Californians shouldn’t worry about Mitt Romney. He’ll be fine, as he’s achieved tremendous success in government, business and the non-profit sectors. The career counseling is more relevant for Gov. Brown as he deals with California’s Democratic super majority.  The urge to overreach by the Legislature appears insatiable as politicians are proposing efforts to make it easier to enact more taxes, limit the power of future citizen-led government reform and consolidate the power of special interests.  

– Mitt, the fight’s done. Time to take a break, enjoy your family and the rewards of your success.  Reflect on what went wrong, don’t be too hard on yourself and decide how you can best contribute in the years ahead. With the coming economic train wreck, there may still be a place for you in politics.

– There really isn’t any future for Mitt Romney in politics or public life, so to speak.  He’s an intelligent, vigorous man who pretty clearly has head for business.  His future is as an investor/mentor, helping small businesses grow. I expect he’ll spend a lot of time in California (much more than during the campaign) and make this his second home—but he’s not going to be involved in politics.  That ship has sailed.

Democrats

– Mitt should go back to his family’s Mormon roots and announce that he’s marrying more wives, since just one — even Ann — couldn’t humanize him during the campaign. Or, he could follow Arnold Schwarzenegger’s lead and go into the movies, playing Mr. Potter in a remake of “It’s a Wonderful Life.” Or, he could just go away, which seems to be what most Republicans have on their Christmas wish list.

– Romney should host a polling conference/workshop and invite all Republican pollsters as attendees and Democratic pollsters as instructors so we can teach them how to poll in the new world with lots more voters of color, cell phones and young people.

– He should take a vow of silence and create a new order of Mormon monks. And spend the rest of his life repenting for his behavior in the campaign. He will need to spend years in meditative reflection just to determine what he really believes.

– The clear next step for Mittens is a private equity partnership with Dan Quayle. Finance is Romney’s natural habitat, and Quayle can show Romney the ropes of being a Republican loser that no one wants to hear from ever again.


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There are 6 comments for this post

  1. avatar Sideline says:

    The GOP is awfully tough on its losers… Romney is being shunned by anyone who doesn’t attend church in a sparkly palace, John McCain is busy trying to get back his cred by bullying African-American women, and poor Bob Dole suffers the indignity of being wheeled into the Chamber only to watch his less-Grand Old Party go whacko-Bircher on disabled people. Even W, a two-time winner, has been dismissed as a RINO, now that he’s gone. You don’t want to turn your back for a moment, when you’re a Republican among “friends…”

  2. avatar chuckmcfadden says:

    “…others don’t want her coming anywhere near politics…” Is there something about Mitt we don’t know?

  3. avatar Ernie Konnyu says:

    You all are a bunch of” aholes” for clowning around with one of America’s best and most successful citizens. Kicking a good man when he is down is low-life stuff. Shame on you barbarians.

  4. avatar JohnF says:

    Ernie,
    I doubt that Mitt is loved by more than 20% of Americans. The republican party spent 6 months doing anybody but Mitt and failed miserably. Just sayin.

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